Quality has to count for something or “You’re only as good as your last DC”

I come before you today, in this forum of What Not To Crochet, to humbly bring to your combined notice, an Item which leaves me concerned for the state of Crochet and the patterns that are being sold to the public.

The intention is not to denigrate this pattern’s representative item for its colour, which is admittedly that least favourite: the indescribable Putrid Pea Soup of a Misbegotten Grinchy Green, the very thought of which makes me, an average crocheter, feel nauseated to the point where only the memory of the 11 x 200gm skeins of pure natural coloured wool I scored for a whopping $1 a skein at a thrift store today can numb the discomfort  but instead to highlight the flawed construction of an item which, to purchase the pattern, will cost you $US 2.99 ( $Aus 3.23, £1.85, €2.06, ¥273, $SGD 4.65, Rph 463) alone.  

Yes, Ladies, Gentlemen, Crocheters of all ages and mental effectiveness, even th0ugh this item is listed in it’s vendor’s “Quick and Easy” section, I ask you all to pause and consider this “slipper” pattern:


Even if a pattern is a) quick, b) easy and/or c) all of the above, should the resulting item not also involve some level of Quality ?

If you travel further down the tunnel of wrist pain that every FPDC carpals you towards,  should not the Finished Product refrain from allowing the wearer’s big toe prolapsing?

If you hook it, whether afghan, amigurumi or applique-intended flower, does it not then exist as a Crocheted item, bearing witness to and representing Crochet-kind throughout the Intarwebs and beyond?   Does the Item not then deserve, in Crochet’s larval form: pattern and skein to be rendered with some element of mechanical/artisan skill?

Consider the flaws above – gaping stitches being probably the most obvious of sins, is this then, a pattern you would actively buy?





  1. Salihan says:

    I’ve been reading your blog for a while now and you crack me up! You are just so honest. I totally agree with your choices. They are definitely things not worth crocheting!

  2. Jessi says:

    I have to admit. These do not seem like very effective slippers. I mean, they wouldn’t warm you up and they would probably make walking more difficult. Plus. Hideous.

  3. Personna says:

    *sigh* I have a son with autism and green is the only color he’ll dress himself in. All other colors and we have to FORCE the clothes on him (his school uniform is blue and white).

    I have a huge amount of green yarn to make him a sweater and hat. And a few boxes of green dye to dye his socks and underwear.

  4. Becky says:

    WOW! First of all I’m SO glad I’m not posted on this site as a NOT… and second of all, I was at a craft show today with another crocheter, who also sold hats, and I saw them and was appalled at her work. From 4 feet away I could see the seam, it wasn’t even, and I could see where she missed a stitch… on what planet do these people think that crappy work should be sold?? :)
    I feel much better now :) I love this site!

  5. justme2 says:

    Looks like that first round (in the toe) is a dc, ch 1 around; take out the ch 1 and the toes might not be quite as open. And in a dark brown or even a deeper forest green they might not look all that bad.

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